Are men supposed to cry?

I just did an online interview about men expressing their feelings and possibly crying. I shared that we live in a society that expects men to follow traditional gender roles (e.g., aggressive, assertive, dominant, non-expressive) expects them to be leaders in their homes and in society. What would it mean to you to have or be a strong, independent, commanding, assertive male but yet could identify and articulate his feelings when prompted? Should we teach our sons to be in tune with their feelings but then be ready to fight if provoked too far? This interview with Ms. Gaston is insightful as we had a chance to explore the complexities of masculinity development, conflict negotiation, and levels of intimacy. ENJOY!!!

http://www.talkshoe.com/talkshoe/web/tscmd/tc/83271

ALSO on YOUTUBE!

Part 1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NUZEnDzf90E

Part 2
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2XI3-gO1e7A

Share a man....Share a woman...

I was recently on a panel with AOL Black Voices talking about relationships, infidelity, and the notion of some women possibly wanting to have a "part time" lover. During the interview, I offered that discussing relationship status, expectations, and the fluidity of honesty and disclosure is tantamount to the survival of the relationship. Using Fantasia, Alicia Keys, and Tiger Woods as reference points, the panelists and I discuss whether or not some women want to have a full time mate.... Enjoy!

http://www.bvonmoney.com/2010/09/10/dr-boyce-video-would-you-be-ok-with-a-part-time-man/

"Tell me what you want, tell me what you need, tell me it ain't good enough for you babe!" Communication in Relationships

You've been feeling uneasy for some time and you know that its time to have a talk with your partner. You want to tell your boyfriend/girlfriend that you are dissatisfied with the way things are going and you want to make some changes to your relationship. You say to him/her, "_____________, I really think we should talk about a few things that I've been thinking about recently." With wide eyes and disgust, your partner says back to you, "Whatever dude! What did you make for dinner for us tonight?" OMG!!! WTF? You sit there shocked and in disbelief that you are ready to share the very essence of your soul and the tattered fibers that needed to be mended in your relationship only to hear your partner ask you about dinner!!! In confusion and dumbfounded, you can't speak. A moment later, your boyfriend/girlfriend says, "Sometimes you can be such a drama queen/king when you want to talk that its getting on my nerves!"

Couples need to create space in their relationship to have sensitive conversations with one another. The need to feel validated, heard, respected, and acknowledged can be lost when people don't care or are consumed with their own lives. Hopefully, you and your partner have the capacity to sit still, talk, and listen to one another. If not, I offer these three video segments that contains relational guidelines to help you and your partner feel "safe" to share whatever you want, need, desire, and believe about yourself and each other. GOOD LUCK!!!

Part 1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nzTPG_EzVjI

Part 2
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UcNZW-1gaWY

Part 3
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-pOPn5jATe0